I didn’t know how much I liked to be in control until I learnt how to drive.
How did it happen? First, I had deliberately postponed my written test a few times because I didn’t want to drive on the road. If you didn’t pass the written test, you could not move forward. It was my perfect excuse.
When I finally passed my written test, I could no longer escape the practise part. So.. when I was told to contact my teacher to arrange my lessons, I reacted badly and began to give into my fear. I created a perfect plan how my driving lessons should beand asked my teacher to follow my lead.
Here’s the record.
Me: “Good morning Mr Kung. I am your student and I would like to learn how to drive with you. I am ONLY available on every Wed between 2 to 3pm because I would have my exam on 19 Dec (Wed) at 2:40pm.”
Mr Kung: “Ok. Have you ever taken any lesson? If not, you might want to consider different time slot that is good for beginner.”
Me: “No. Thank you. I would ONLY drive …”
This conversation went on for another 3 minutes and I had probably used a dozen times of “I could ONLY”, “It is not possible” and “I do not want to”.
After I hung up, I began to laugh. I laughed because I sounded like a perfect control freak. As someone who had absolutely no idea how to turn on the car, I actually told my teacher how to teach me.
Immediately I called back and apologised. I also promised him that I would listen to him and follow his plan. After all, he is the teacher not me.
Now I look back. It is incredible to see how my hesitation and resistance could easily turn me into a control freak. It is equally amazing to see how once I let go of my fear and decide to trust my teacher, everything began to flow.
My question: Where do your hesitate and resist in life? How have your excuses controlled you? What could you do to release them?